The Awkward Moment When...

Ladies in the thick of the dating scene have all faced this problem – you have to take a shit and your boyfriend, boo, fav smanger, or whoever-- is near. Oh Lawd, what to do, what to do?

Ohh ladies, we have all been there – that cute moment when you two are snuggled up on the couch watching TV and all-of-a-sudden your stomach is on full blown BGs. Or you’re spending the night with your boyfriend, boo, fav smanger, or whoever for the first time and you need to take a shit. What do you do?

My girl Millie has got the right idea! 

My girl Millie has got the right idea! 

I have known women who have been holed up at a man’s place, eating and smanging for days on end, who have kept their poop lodged inside for that entire time; not letting it out until they had the home court advantage. Some have even said that they will not take a shit at their boyfriend’s house for the first six months!

In situations of dire need, women do have various techniques in which to drop the chocolate kids off at the pool without having their man be the wiser. Things like taking a shit then a shower, pulling a sit-and-flush, or padding the bowl with toilet paper so the plops aren't loud—are some of the ways in which they accomplish this.  No I am not making this up! 

You may be laughing, but this is apparently a very important issue for women – based on the fact that it is quite often a topic of conversation. Women are human beings and have to pass fecal matter in the same way as men. However taking a shit around a guy is often viewed as taboo, and when it happens for the first time it is often seen as a relationship milestone--well at least for women. I wonder if men even notice or care.  Men, do you have popping etiquette? Do men hold on to their fecal matter for days for fear of ridicule? Do men notice that women don’t take shits around them?

Friends Don’t Let Friends get backed up…CONSTIPATION IS NEVER SEXY!!! Ladies, take control of your lives and shit freely – just remember to hop in the shower immediately after; I hear the steam helps the smell! LOL